Saturday, August 22, 2009


Lest you think I've got it all figured out, last night was horrible. Course, it wasn't him, really. I lost my nipple shield in the dark, popped him on the unprotected boob and suffered horrible vasospasms for the rest of the night. And he didn't go past sleeping two hours at a shot from the time I went to bed to, well, now - almost supper time the next day.

Some people have suggested I MIGHT have a dash of postpartum depression. Oh hell, it's possible. But I want to know how you tell the difference between full-blown PPD and just plain sleep deprivation? I think if anyone got 4-plus hours of straight sleep just three separate times over the span of a month and a half, wouldn't they could go a bit squirrely?

Yes, I'm moody. Yes, I experience highs and lows. No, I don't feel very well most of the time. Funny enough, each mood swing seems to correspond with times that I've had (minimal at best) sleep vs. not had much sleep at all. So yeah, I could pack Mac up and drag us down to a PPD support group (which I've heard is very good and valuable and helpful), or I could do my best just to get some more damn shut eye. Then see if I still suffer from depression.

I'm just saying.

Of course, I have been hiding in the bathtub for the last half hour. Maybe it's time to go rescue Trevor who is trying to juggle a fussy baby, dishes and making lunch.

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Blogger Naomi ~ 8:13 PM

Why not go to the support group? No harm in it. Doesn't really matter why the depression exists, in my opinion - help for it is help for it.  

Anonymous angdesj ~ 1:54 AM


I agree with you, which scares me a bit. I would hate for you not to seek help if necessary! However I had several people say the say the same thing to me and I was like "how the hell should I cope with all this, without being not myself"? Now I don't know your history, but I do know being insulted by the mention of PPD becasue everyone feels the need to label everyone,(personal paranoia).
I am on a teeter totter here, with what to say. Once I got more sleep and my incision healed and was more mobile, I felt like a "normal" person. BUT if you have a history of depression, it doesn't hurt to check these things out. I would love to watch your baby for you BTW. At the very least we could get a Guiness and have Trevor watch baby Mack while I told you various inappropriate stories of peoples miseries and low points in always helps me:)  

Anonymous Anonymous ~ 9:57 AM

Even if you don't have PPD, why not check out the support group anyway. It can't hurt. As a person who suffers from depression, I know the hardest step is reaching out for help. You are surrounded by people who love you, find strength in that.

Anonymous Anonymous ~ 10:05 AM  

Blogger Aaron ~ 8:59 AM

Monica, I would caution you from blogging in the bath tub, just something about electrical devices and water, you know. Unless you weren't actually bathing and just hiding out...then carry on!  

Blogger Working From Home Today ~ 9:11 AM

Um, no, Aaron, I'd NEVER blog in the bath (cough!).

Though if I DID, I'd make sure to set the computer on the (closed) toilet seat beside the tub so there'd be no danger.  

Blogger Robin ~ 3:22 PM

AngDesj, if the story telling is going to take place in your new hot tub, I sure hope I'm invited.

Thinking of you, Monica!  

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