Wednesday, June 11, 2008

On Underwear

Another marital debate needs settling. This is going to be ridiculous. It’s about underwear and pajamas.

Trev is a clean kind of guy, a ‘leave the house showered, shaved and shined’ kind of guy. He irons his shirts (since he mostly wears collared shirts, this is a serious commitment). He absolutely puts me to shame, as I’m really more of a ‘find the cleanest pair in the pile’ kind of girl. A ‘hope I can sweat out the wrinkles before I get to work' kind of girl.

Heh.

But there is this one thing about my husband: he does not wear underwear to bed. Just pajama bottoms. And I don’t get it. I am strict that there be underwear at all times (er, well, most times). He says that’s just how it’s always been. He never really thought about it.

I remember the first time I went to a friend’s for a sleepover. I was very young and she didn’t wear underwear to bed and it pretty much blew my mind. I guess it was one of the first times I became truly conscious of difference. Other people discovered race or gender, I saw underwear. Or lack thereof.

But here’s my thinking: There are two items in one’s wardrobe that are worn most frequently: underwear and pajamas. Other items, like shirts and bras and jeans, tend to get maybe two wears tops before they're tossed in the wash. Underwear gets one wear (one hopes).

But not so with pajamas. A set of pajamas will likely be worn much more frequently than anything else before it's tossed in the wash. So doesn’t it only make sense to extend their cleanliness by including underwear? Which is changed frequently?

Am I wrong here, people?

And before you even go into "beds are cleaner", they are not. Check out that pillow of yours. Little heavier than when you first bought it? Sweat, skin cells and bug poop. Beds are 6 to 8 hours of cozy, moist, nocturnal ecology. I'd take a bit of dirt on my jeans over that any day.

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12 comments:

Anonymous James ~ 12:22 AM

Interesting. At first I thought you were crazy but I began to see your point. Maybe.

If Trev is clean enough to have the sex with, he's clean enough to wear pajamas for up to one week.

Underwear is up close and personal with your naughty bits. Pajamas hang loose--like the sheets on your bed. Air flows freely and there is no moisture from crevices that contaminate the pajamas with bacteria.

Now, if he dribbles, it's a different story. The front will become unsanitary.

If he hoses off after fecal episodes then the other end should be OK too.

Does he excrete semen during night erections? If so, it's usually not much of an issue but it might shorten the life of his pajamas a day or two.

I remember wearing pajamas as a kid but I have to have underwear now. If I'm not lifting and separating, I'm just not comfortable. Yes, I wear briefs but don't listen to the myths. My sperm has been proven on multiple occasions.

Hey, you asked.  


Blogger Working From Home Today ~ 5:02 AM

Oh my. I'm a little sorry I asked.

Okay, I'll agree that MAYBE there is more airflow. But then I think about the combined weight of sheets, blankets and thighs and I'm think it's not a significant difference.  


Anonymous Mari ~ 9:23 AM

I hate pajamas...I don't understand them as I feel they are constricting. Why is Trev wearing anything to bed - be free...just watch for the cat claws!  


Blogger Marisa ~ 12:39 PM

I was with Trev... up until I realized he wasn't washing the PJs every day. My feeling is that whatever you're wearing to sleep in should get washed after you wear it - most people sweat a lot in their sleep, for one thing.  


Blogger Sleeves ~ 1:05 PM

This is why we should all sleep like Fred and Wilma: in separate beds. Then, everyone can have it their own way.  


Blogger notquiteawake ~ 3:07 PM

My mom always said you should NOT wear underwear with pj's as your under parts need time to breath.
I disagree. Underwear AND PJ's is the way to go.

She never actually said "under parts". I made that up. But it's funny no?  


Anonymous John Kennedy ~ 9:46 AM

My mother taught me to always wear clean underwear to bed in case I was run over by a car in my sleep.

I will agree that pj bottoms worn without underwear should be washed as frequently as underwear.

PJ bottoms worn with underwear should be washed as frequently as sheets.

These are not guidelines... they are hard and fast rules that must be followed in order to maintain a civil society.  


Anonymous Marcus Wenner ~ 1:46 PM

I am of the school of underwear at all times..but since moving to South Texas...where the moisture factor ratio comes into full effect. I have in the recent years taken to going commando under the flannel pants.

Now..that being said. I agree with Mari (shout out to the MtotheH.) that PJ's are restricting. And have woken up on occasion in a 'night terror' thinking a giant flannel boa constrictor was trying to crush the life out of me in my sleep.

Maybe its time to put into production my ultimate idea. The Three Holed Underwear! Its a pair of Tighty Whiteys with 3 count them...3 leg holes. They would be made of sturdier materials to combat such things as Nocturnal Emissions, and Dribblage..(thanks for the visuals James) and maybe they'd go down to the thigh just in case you had to run outside in the middle of night due to a house fire or the hooker stealing your wallet.

Why 3 leg holes?? Well Im glad you asked. Lets name the leg holes A, B, C. Monday...A/B..Tuesday..(rotate left) B/C...Wednesday...(rotate left) C/A. Thursday (turn inside out and repeat cycle.) Sunday...God rested and so should your undies. Thats wash day.

I love teh B10gging!  


Blogger bstockton ~ 7:33 AM

I guess I'm late to the pajama party, but I just wanted to point out that if you go commando under your pajamas (which is perfectly natural, legal, and as God intended) then you are only wearing them for about 8 hours per day (unless you're a hobo. Or James. Or James the hobo), so you can easily get two days out of them before a wash, 3 if you're desperate.  


Blogger bstockton ~ 12:53 PM

BTW, I shouldn't have let myself be bullied by the spell checker. I much prefer the Canadian spelling of 'pyjama.'  


Blogger Schmutzie ~ 12:32 PM

I sleep 100% completely naked. I don't even own pajamas. And when I did own pajamas, I never used them to sleep in.  


Anonymous Marcus ~ 1:45 PM

Am I the only one returning here hoping that we hear more about the infamous 'sleepover'?  


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