Wednesday, November 15, 2006

New Pencils

Oh, the joy! A whole package of 2HB pencils. A sharpener that fits smoothly into my hand. A bright blue – blue! – eraser. People, I am now ready to do my French homework.

Wait, no Bescherelle. Maybe I’ll get to it tomorrow.

CONVERSATION WITH SELF AT S*BUX

Ooh! Gingerbread loaf with icing!
No.
Why not?
Remember the deal? You’re not eating that shit until Christmas.
Pooh.
Hey, you made the deal….
Ooh look! Caramel Praline Lattes!
Oh Jeezus. You may as well just get the loaf!
Plus the latte? You really think so?
No, you fool! Neither! You should get neither!
So plain coffee or tea….
Exactly.
Both of which I could just make at home.
And save money.
So there’s really no point to me being here.

…?
(Sigh) I guess you can treat yourself. It’s not like you buy these all the time. You’d have to leave the house more often to do that.
Ha. Okay, so one Grande Caramel Praline Latte.
No loaf.
No loaf.
Good.
“That will be $7.52, please.”
Wow, that seemed expensive.
No kidding. Strange….
“Grande Caramel Praline Latte!”
“Thank you.”
“Oh, ma’am? Don’t forget your loaf!”*

*True story. I didn’t know I’d ordered the loaf until it was handed to me. My brain is ordering without me. My hands are paying without my consent. Which makes me wonder if I’ve not just had a Picardian experience and S*bux is, in fact, the Borg.

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1 comments:

Blogger Eden ~ 2:49 PM

Mmm... Patrick Stewart.

You are going to kick ass in that French class. I envy your facility (root: facile) with languages.  


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