Friday, October 20, 2006

The New Customer Service

The prepaid mobile phone that I never use has to function tomorrow. Busy day, probably lots of calls to make. So I dug it out of the clutter drawer and called Fido with three requests:
1. Change the name on the account to my new last name.
2. Update my credit card info
3. Add time to my phone so I can use it tomorrow.

Five minutes later:
1. Done
2. Done
3. “And what else can I do for you today?”
“I’d like to prepay for some minutes.”
“I can’t do that, ma’am.”
“Why not?”
“It takes 24 – 48 hours for your credit card information to update and then you can automatically add minutes.”
“24-48 hours? But I need it tomorrow. Can’t you just do it?”
“Only if you have a voucher.”
“Where do I get a voucher?”
“Any authorized Fido dealer.”
I look around. It's the end of day Friday and my home looks like a crack house, minus the crack. I have guests arriving tomorrow and have to be out the door to work by 8AM. I don’t have TIME to go look for a stinking voucher. “Er, that’s not going to work. So even though you have my credit card number, you’re telling me you can’t sell me minutes?”
“Not without the voucher.”
“Oh.”
“Did you need anything else?”
“No, I guess not.”
“Was I able to provide you with service to your satisfaction today?”
“Well, I called to make my phone work and it’s not going to work for 24-48 hours, so no.”
“So you are saying I didn’t provide you with service to your satisfaction?”
“Well (nervous giggle), er, no. See, I still don’t have a working phone. 'Course, I know it’s not your fault....”
“Okay,” snippy now, “Thank you for calling Fido. Have a nice evening.” Click.
I must have screwed her ratings or something.

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