Thursday, August 17, 2006
How the Dog Did It
Here is how the dog peed on my back:
I was sitting on a hill enjoying the early evening sun. I was listening to my iPod so I didn’t hear the dog. Suddenly, I felt something warm and wet on my back. I knew what it was immediately because, oh yes, I have been peed on before. But those times it was on my leg and that's gross enough.
I sprang up and danced around shrieking loudly, drawing curious looks from the baseball teams in the field below and the soccer teams on the pitch above.
“What happened?” the other dog owner asked.
“He peed on me!”
“Which? Your dog?” Now, she couldn’t have known my dog is female so I’m glad I didn’t say something bitchy about penises and leg raising.
“Did he really pee on me?” I asked, frantically spinning around in place and grabbing at my t-shirt.
“Oh yes. He did,” she said mournfully.
“I’m going home.”
“Who did it?”
“That one!” I pointed to the massive, ruddy Ridgeback-cross.
“Him? Oh my god! He didn’t! Oh, I am so sorry. I’m dog-sitting, he’s not mine, I didn’t know he would do such a thing-“
“It’s okay.”
“But it isn’t! Oh, I feel so bad.”
“You didn’t pee on me.”
“But he’s my responsibility.”
“Well, I’m going home,” I repeated, and I did, trying to keep my back to bushes and face to oncoming traffic. Because it looked exactly like a big dog just peed on me.
posted by Working From Home Today
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