Thursday, October 13, 2005
That Mean Lady Tried to Sell Me Stuff
I was actually shaking when I sat down at my computer desk this morning. And close to tears. I was so upset I blew bubbles into my Earl Grey (decaf) when I tried to take a sip.
Death in the family? Fatal disease? Dog run over by a car? Nope. An infomercial.
I was flipping channels and landed on one for something called “Blast Body Jam” or something. Hey, I thought, that looks kind of neat. It’s like the stuff I used to teach. I miss the stuff I used to teach. I could order it and recreate my old classes in my living room, I thought excitedly. Yes, that’s exactly what I’ll do!
I flew through the name, address and credit card info. But 10 minutes later the lady with the American accent at the other end of the universe, by the sounds of it, had offered me the 4th consecutive ‘extra feature that you simply need for this work out to be 100% effective.’
‘Er, how much is that going to cost me in total?’
‘4 easy payments of only $63.95. Plus the initial $19.95, of course.’
‘American?’
‘Yes, and we’re sending you a month’s worth of supplements for only a dollar. You will continue to receive these supplements for only $30 a month unless you call to cancel within 30 days.’
‘Oh my, ' I said, realizing I was getting suckered by an infomercial racket.
‘So I’ll just process this,' she said quickly.
‘Wait, can you do me a favour?’
‘I’m sorry?’
‘Can you cancel my order?’ My voice wobbled.
‘The whole thing?’
‘Yes.’
‘But why?’ she actually whined.
‘Because all I wanted was a simple DVD and this is just… too much…,’ I trailed off. I sounded like a little old lady who just realized she sent her life savings to Nigeria.
‘But we were almost done!’
‘I just… no.’
‘Okay, well call us back if you change your mind.’
‘Yeah,’ I say, but I’d already hung up.
See? This is why I should never get out of bed. "Just stop watching morning TV!" you say.
Pshaw.
posted by Working From Home Today
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